I think the note about never knowing when a cis person may be threatening to a trans person is an important one. Not to make false equivalencies or declare "oh this is exactly this same situation" because I recognize that they aren't, but it's similar to the idea of a woman being cautious around men, or other marginalized groups being cautious around members of the dominant group.

And I'd say that an important part of being an ally (though I'm speaking AS an ally, so I'm not the expert) is realizing that the mistrust isn't about us. It's not about "omg how dare you not trust me! You're so mean! You think I'm an awful person!" It's about something that's a very real threat to you that as a cis person I don't have to deal with.

I strive to be a good ally, and I appreciate the queer and feminist allies that I have in my life. But I think a lot of people get too self-involved with it, and forget that being an ally is about the people you're being an ally to... not yourself as an ally.

Idk, that seems like it maybe got off of your original point somewhat. But I haven't been around your journal long enough to encounter many of your rants, so it's not that I've been avoiding them. :P